What Not to Say to Someone Grieving – Cremation Services Fort Myers, FL
One should never say many things to someone grieving the loss of a loved one, especially if that person has chosen cremation services in Fort Myers, FL. This is because choosing cremation can be seen as a way of coping with a loss, and therefore specific comments or assumptions can be incredibly hurtful. So, what should you avoid saying to someone who has lost a loved one?
It can be tough to know what to say to someone who is grieving. You want to help and offer comfort, but sometimes even the best intentions can backfire. Words can unintentionally make the pain and sorrow more intense.
If you’re unsure what to say, it’s OK to express your condolences and let the grieving person know that you’re there for them. Sometimes, the most important thing you can do is listen.
Gendron Funeral & Cremation Services Inc. offers tips on what not to say to someone grieving to help make the process a little bit easier. By avoiding these statements, you can help show your support for the bereaved and allow them to mourn in their way.
Properly Console Someone Grieving – Fort Myers, FL, cremation services
Grieving the loss of loved ones is part of Fort Myers, FL, cremation services. When family members are mourning in great sorrow and pain, people can unintentionally make that pain and that sorrow even more intense because they say the wrong thing.
People who are grieving are, first and foremost, on emotional overload. Every emotion is raw and on the surface. Therefore, even the most innocent words can hit the wrong way, and the reaction may not be pleasant.
Anger and grief, interesting enough, are very closely related emotions. So, a grieving person is much more likely to get angry at words that seem trite, insensitive, rude, disrespectful, or dismissive. People say many things all the time that fit into this category. It’s not that people mean to elicit anger or be anything but respectful and supportive, but they don’t know how to console someone properly – and many times, being quiet and simply being there is enough.
Platitudes – Grief
One way to hurt the grieving with your words is to offer platitudes. The term “platitudes” refers to saying something that has been repeated so often that it reflects thoughtlessness by the person saying it. Platitudes come in many shapes and sizes, but they all end up causing more pain for people in mourning.
One example of a platitude is, “They’re in a better place.” This intensifies pain twofold: first, it reminds the grieving that their place is minus someone they love, and second, there’s an unintended suggestion that the area with the family was inferior or defective.
Another example of a platitude is, “Everything happens for the best.” Grieving people may rationally know that if the dying process is long and hard for their loved one, death is best because they’re no longer suffering, but the death of their loved one is not the best for them. It doesn’t feel empathetic to hear someone say this, although the intentions and motives behind the words are not meant to be that way.
A final example of a platitude is, “Let me know if you need anything.” People say this to people who are grieving, and they genuinely mean it. But the emotional bottom has dropped out for people who are suffering. They don’t know what they need right away. And, when they get to a point where they have a clue of their needs, they’re not going to let anyone know. It’s just how we work as humans.
A final thing that can intensify the pain of grieving people is a phrase that rolls off the tongue with such ease without any thinking far too often: “I know how you feel.” That phrase will trigger the anger side of grief because we can never honestly know how someone else feels. We may share a similar experience, such as losing a parent, a child, or a sibling, but that’s where our understanding ends. Relationships are unique, individual, and personal. No two are the same, so we can’t trivialize those connections by assuming we know what they are.
Conclusion
For guidance on comforting grieving people after Fort Myers, FL cremation services, our caring and knowledgeable staff at Gendron Funeral & Cremation Services Inc. is here to assist you. You can visit our funeral home at 2325 E Mall Dr Fort Myers, FL 33901, or call us today at (239) 274-0088.